Monday, December 14, 2009

Lost

have been so lost these few months.. not sure watever i'm doing is rite o wrong? i'm just feeling so so so lost.. seems like there isn't any suitable direction for me to move on.. it's even worse when i had a great fall from the top of my confidence level and now seems like gonna takes time to rebuild it.. omg~~ i'm jus feeling so USELESS rite now... yup.. and i guess some of u that follow me in FB. I did type a phrase 'EGO can bring you to enjoy the highest level of self-satisfaction but it also can drag you down to the lowest point of confidence'. yea..those KNS frens and family members did left some comments telling that i should have admit it earlier.. haha.. yea.. an EGO person leaving such phrase.. sure got sth wrong wif me rite? dun ask me what happen? i'm not sure..

STRESS?? of cos got la.. but it seems like it's not related to STRESS.. my besties advised me to had a long holiday.. and I DID!! tat was the longest leaves (10 days straight) that i'd taken ** yup.. during the time when my dad was hospitalised and THANK GOD! he's fine now ** and i should say tat's the best and worst time i had. haha... freak me out.. haha.. did nuthin except keep my mum accompany as my siblings are working. my sis went back to SG and bro went back to KL. so?? no one at home to make sure she's not kelam kabut..

RELATIONSHIP?? no wor.. liangzai n me quite ok.. stil fight all the times. but we do enjoy our new lives at new place.. haha.. 2 of us in 22' X 75' place.. yea.. house work is like killing me but no worries.. i jus hired a FOC phillipino he-maid ** liangzai **.. so he does all the cleaning and i'm sticking my butt on the chairs and make my fingers to do all the typing and clicking all the time right in front of my lappie. and when the stupid thing named 'INTERNET CONNECTION' doesnt work properly, i will then ask my IT specialist to gao tim the rest of the thing at once. AGAIN, it's Free of CHARGE!! how nice rite? yahoo~~

FINANCIAL?? er.. aiyo.. so PNC.. dowan to tel can o not? er.. ok la.. jus to fulfill all the curiousity out there.. nuthin to worry too.. cos my account balance will tinggal RM1 every end of the month due to high expenses and low salary. yea.. nuthin to be proud of.. but other way round, i'm quite proud to announce it out cos.. U THINK WANNA SPEND ALL YOUR MONEY SO EASY MEH?? SUMMORE NIT TO HAVE A BALANCE OF 1 BUCK.. hahaha... oh ya.. i kno what u all will think... I stil got liangzai ma.. liangzai's money is mine and mine is still mine rite? so pandai.. yea.. he even geng.. can left RM0.50 in his account.. oppss.. sorry dear, i gotta make u feel proud of this over here.. hahaa...

see?? i jus dunno wat happened to me.. i still can remember one of my juniors asked me abt my resolutions, my dreams and achievement i had throughout the years and etc etc.. and guess what? i'm totally BLANK.. so pathetic rite? ** opps.. i'd forgotten that i got a DSLR.. i'd forgotten that i'd just move in to my new place.. i'd forgotten that i'd a nice trip wif my bunch of craziest frens to phuket and my dearest liangzai... these are all considered as some of my achievements rite? **

i went home last weekend and enjoy the times at home.. yea.. do nuthin but keep my fingers to do the job rite in front of my lappie and also keep my mouth do the job for making sure all the food are digested starting from my mouth down to the throat then down to my tummy and make sure it come out become SHIT! haha.. hard job, u kno.. cos some medical articles mentioned that ladies got the highest percentage of kena CONSTIPATION.. so? gotta make sure this dont hit me lo.. o else whole face pimples again.. aiyo...

so how?? apa macam?? apa buleh buat?? =.=" have u all been thru this?? i think i'm moving into DEPRESSION stage.